When people ask how I’m doing, I say that I have good hours. How in the fuck else am I supposed to respond? I don’t know how a manic depressive feels, but I imagine this is similar, although on a much smaller scale. I swing from wanting to burn it all down to mildly okay before finishing at wanting to end myself.
In the age of social media and constant connection, how do you deal? I’m still dealing with the technical stuff, so I can’t block yet. How
do you deal with the memories that pop up, and the pictures, the friends..? All that crap… ESPECIALLY, when the life your ex is leading is a big stinky load of bullshit.
All I want to do is call her out on her ways, but I’m trying to be better. It just pisses me off that she is running around with our friends, spreading a bunch of shit about me, and that’s not when she’s fucking the guy she cheated on me with who has a girlfriend. Yeah, that’s still happening.
I know I’m supposed to go out and make new friends and do new things. I know what I’m supposed to do. It doesn’t mean that I want to. I don’t want to see people. I don’t remember how to do this alone.
How do you deal with all of this bullshit?